Well, isn’t it said, “A great man is always willing to be little..”
Little in a sense? modest.. The opposite of this word is
boastfulness. Hah! You know, there are different types of boasters, one those
who have a lot lot lot more than the general public and always show off. The
other, who may have less than you but then too exaggerate things to such an
extent that they make you visualise what they have in a dramatic manner
(sometimes, they pretend as if they are living a castle life!). I, personally
have seen these two kinds in my society. You can detect the former from his
behaviour that he is a haughty and arrogant kinda person. On the other hand,
the latter thinks that I keep boasting my fake identity and the person standing
next to me is stupid and can’t identify me from how I talk, walk, wear or
stand. I am the only intelligent person on this planet Earth!.... No wonder,
these people make themselves a comic eyesore ‘cause usually people like me ask
cross-questions to them making them entangled in their own talks!! But, why is
the need to show off??.. Ever asked the question to yourself? Maybe, you’ve
thought, this is because it impacts how the world addresses you. But why do you
want to win praise for who you are not? Why can’t you just be yourself and show
the people the “real you” and achieve your goals? Being modest doesn’t mean you
shouldn’t have desires, or anything you should get deprived of your needs for
living, or start living like a monk. It means that A-Z whatever you’re having,
there’s actually no need to show-off other people unless you really have some
important work. I remember a story my dad told me….
Once, Goa's Ex-CM, Late Mr. Manohar Parekh was in
the streets riding on his scooter (First example of how modest he was!) and a branded car from behind, struck his vehicle. A man came out of it flabbergasted in
anger and started shouting. He asked, “Do you know who my dad is? He is the
chief police officer of this area! I can jail you if I want, in the crime of
riding clumsily on the streets, but I am kind enough to let you go, remember
not to repeat again.” After listening all this, Mr. Manohar Parekh smiled,
patted the boy’s shoulder gently, and told him politely “Go home and tell your
dad that you have hit the vehicle of the CM of Goa today!” The boy was
left astounded. Then Mr. Manohar went his way.
Now, What do you think you would have done if you were
in this situation? Maybe you would have interrupted in between while the boy
said “Do you know my dad?--” and you would have been like “Do you know me?”
Hehee… and you would have had a nasty fight, because you know humans, no matter your post, if you succeed in raising the lava level of a person, he won't stop! (Though exceptions exist!!) . But modesty is always accompanied
by politeness… Modesty is something that makes you stay grounded and
comfortable with people around you even if you are very popular or at a high
post. Now, the most important question of all, that maybe whooshing around your
head, how to be modest? (Well, you can’t buy a “Modesty course”!! can you?) Umm...
I would recommend different types people to learn to be simple in different
ways. So first let’s categorize these people those who can give a try to be
modest, shall we?
1) People who are modest, but don't know it. (They do not need to!)
2) People who want to be modest but can’t. (I
will explain further how!!)
3) People who are showy every time.
So, First, let's start with number first! "People who are modest, but don't know about it"
When your friend is showing his new toy, and you get a
feeling ‘wow that’s great!’ this is a sign of modesty. Hmm, you might be
thinking, this can be maturity, right? But modesty and maturity are different.
It is a fact that modesty may come after a certain age, but still
there is no age for being modest. You can see modesty even in a child if his
parents have high moral values. Like, when his parents buy him the latest version of the most popular toy among kids, he plans to share it with everyone rather than boasting himself, his parents or the toy itself. Maturity however, is different, because it
allows you to make your own decisions (Usually according to your age and
situation) and they may or may not be modest.
So, if you are in this field, congo!! You are modest! All you need to do is just keep this good
work up. Teeny-weeny things that you need to keep in your mind are:
v
Never
expect the fruit of what you’ve done.
v
Be
kind and help people.
v
Control
your anger. (This is the main thing!!)
The second kind...."Who want to be modest, but can't"
Haha!! There are these types of people present around
you too! The main obstacle in their way is that they cannot resist themselves.
Take your friend’s new toy example, if your friend goes boasting and praising
his toy and these kind of people are present there in your midst, they won’t be
able to endure and bring their own best toy for showing just like your friend
is doing. You know, the reason behind this is, competition and fame... If you
are this kind, gain control over this attitude, and you can easily follow
humility leading to modesty. But, remember, this is going to be tough. Yeah, I
have experienced it ‘cause I was this category as well. (Well, I haven’t improved
wholly, but till an extent of 70%!! I am still practicing..) The mantra which I
used was, “Start giving, and be kind..” Now, I am not saying to give your
possessions to people! Take an example of your home, your sister is asking you
to give her your pen, because hers is not working. You might be thinking, Ah,
come on! I am not that rude, I can easily give that to her!! But the twist comes when that’s your favourite
pen, which you got on your birthday by your closest friend, it is very
expensive and you have not given it to anyone in your house to write because
you love it very much, and, No ink for this pen is available in the market, you need to buy a whole new pen to replace it. To rub salts on the wounds, this is the only pen in the
house left. What would you do now? That’s where you learn to share.. The moment
you realise that it is not an edible thing, my sister won’t eat it and it will
get over someday, it’s just a thing for use, I can give it!! You will get over with the
first step. Now, what if, it is really an edible thing? Say, you like it most,
umm.. in my case, pizza! Yummy!! The situation is, you both got the same amount
of slices to eat, your sis has finished eating her part, you are eating yours,
lavishly. The little one is staring at that piece, hoping she would catch some
luck. You love that pizza and you know that you get to eat it just once in a
year, on your birthday (just suppose). You of course are not like older people, who get melted
on the looks of these tiny tots..You are possessive and determined to eat that
last piece all by yourself. But, just think, what if, you share it with your
sis, imagine the smile on her face and the content feeling you’ll have (more
than if you ate that piece all by yourself..) This is when you are
modest. (Most people fail at this, so did I at the first attempt, but I am eagerly waiting for this
to come again, I’ve developed some thinking skills now!)
Last kind but not the least!! "Showy people"
People who are showy all the time can be modest. You read it right, it seems
impossible, but, anything is possible! How? See, first of all (if you are this
category) you’ll need a lot of perseverance to end your ‘show-off nature’. You will
have to burn the elements like thoughts “Hum hee hum hai, baaki paani kum hai!”
[this means we are (or I am) the best and the rest people are losers], the
competition and fame flame, there maybe the need you’ll have to learn to share
their things to others, and so on....The procedure is same, but the strength
taken is a lot, because, the height of “showing-off” is also a lot!! This will
need a lot of hard work if you really wanna change, but at the end, you’ll be a
changed personality, a better person with high thoughts..!
Courtesy: My mom and Dad.
Love to: My
younger sis
Author: Pihukuhu Pitara
OC of Pihukuhu Pitara
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